Category Archives: Eggs & Dairy

Why I stopped making recipes

A vegan version of shepherd's pie with mushrooms, chickpeas, lentils, veggies, and a crispy sweet potato topping.

A vegan version of shepherd’s pie with mushrooms, chickpeas, lentils, veggies, and a crispy sweet potato topping.

So as you probably know, this entire blog went silent after its last post published on February 10th. Why? Several reasons.

First of all, I got fat and lazy, literally. Shortly after Christmas I went from 135 pounds back up to 180, and it literally took less than 4 months. I know this because I was recording my weight near the end of March, and I was exactly 167.2 on the 19th of March and 179.6 on the 6th of April. This was after I had went from 210 to 140 within a year and couldn’t maintain my weight as I kept dropping all the way to 135 in 3 months. You can call it metabolic damage, but I’m honestly not too sure what happened… One day, the same day I took the test to become a certified food handler, I started to feel incredibly shaky, and at the time I was speculating that I was developing diabetes since I exhibited a lot of the symptoms. Along with the shakiness, I felt hunger. Insatiable hunger. I have never experienced a hunger so fierce before in my life. I was strongly compelled to shovel every nearby calorie source I could find into my mouth and keep eating until I was ready to explode. I ate lunch at 3 different restaurants that day, and I couldn’t even taste the food at the first two. I had to drown my pho noodles in some weird sauce I found on the table before I could even begin to taste anything. It was unreal, I was out of control, and I couldn’t figure out why I was doing what I was doing. Also my mother came back with lots of sweets from Hungary and some pastries that my grandmother baked on that day as well, and I ate pretty much all of that stuff too. Ever since this bizarre day I’ve been stuffing myself until I couldn’t even move, and one time I actually did end up vomiting. I also went vegan some time in April, but that didn’t stop me from eating bread. My sudden change in weight brought on depression, insecurities, apathy, and my energy levels also completely dropped putting me in no mood to cook, let alone take pictures and write a recipe that no one would ever use.

Second of all, I got a job at a restaurant on the 19th of February. I’m now a full-time Chef de Partie and working my way up. This blog never made me any money, all it did for me was give me something to do besides playing video games and watching Star Trek. I had passion, and I was ready to throw some money at this site, but that passion is 100% GONE. I have better things to do with my life than be a fucking food-blogger. I get paid to cook now, this site is a waste of time, and it finally started feeling like a waste of time.

Thirdly, as stated earlier, I have adopted a vegan diet. I was tired of pretending that I was okay with animals having to die so we can eat their cooked corpses especially if it doesn’t benefit us in any logical way besides satiating our cravings to eat dead animals. Our culture is absolutely fucking disgusting. What about eggs? You mean hen’s periods marketed by an industry that grinds up the male chicks alive because they are of no use to the industry? No, this is not okay. It is FUCKED UP. And dairy? As much as I love sour cream, butter and cheese, what I don’t love is an industry that takes newborn calves away from their mothers (who are literally being milked dry by the way) and sending them off to the veal industry. I’d rather leave the sour cream off of my mushroom paprikash than give my money to these psychopaths.

And lastly, it dawned on me that nobody really cares. Nobody’s really interested in authenticity when it comes to another culture’s cuisine besides the people who belong to said culture. I am fed up with the push to remain true to a culture’s roots rather than experimenting and seeing what works better; it goes against our instinctual nature to evolve and better ourselves, and I don’t want to be part of the group that holds humanity back. This is another one of the reasons I’ve adopted a vegan diet; it seems most vegans nowadays are thriving, significantly more so than health-conscious meat eaters. Humans have the potential to be so much more than stationary obese fatties who on the inside know it’s wrong to kill and eat animals for pure pleasure but still do because they think it’s funny to die a pre-mature gluttonous death of cancer or a heart attack in their 70s. Vegans have a much lower risk of all-cause mortality, and the amount of energy high-carb vegans seem to have is incredible. I have admittedly struggled in my own transition, but I know it’s the right then to do and I’m going to keep doing my best to stay on track. I really don’t care if meat would help me lose weight, I cannot bring myself to eat another animal ever again.

Look at you. You probably follow a bunch of blogs, leave nice comments such as “Wow these look amazing! I plan to try them!” but do you ever actually try them? Of course you don’t. You’re not helping anybody. Your kindness means nothing to me. I don’t care about compliments, all I care about are results, and this website did not provide me with results.

I may start some other projects in the future, but this site is done, and my passion for cooking has reached an end. I will continue to work as a chef until I find my new calling. I’ve always had a thing for marine biology…

 

Also, go vegan. I don’t want to hear SHIT about how you “need” your meat. There is NO reason to have meat in your mouth unless you’re gay. Just shut the fuck up and carb the fuck up.

-Christopher

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Kakaós Csiga (Cocoa Rolls)

Flaky cocoa-filled pastries.

(Pronunciation: “Kah-kah-osh Chee-gaw”)

Although the translation for this is actually “cocoa snails”, I figured since some people aren’t a fan of escargot I’d put “cocoa rolls” in the title instead.

Jokes aside, these baked sweets are common in Hungary, similar to cinnamon rolls, but with cocoa powder instead of cinnamon. Cocoa rolls are generally larger than cinnamon rolls since the dough is rolled out much more thinly which makes space for more filling. These also don’t include that deliciously rich cream cheese glaze that cinnamon rolls usually come drizzled in… But then again, this is my website, and today we’re doing cocoa rolls! \(^O^)/

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Rice Pudding

Creamy breakfast style rice pudding topped with cinnamon.

Creamy breakfast style rice pudding topped with cinnamon.

 

Tejberizs… milchreis… Arroz con leche… Riz au lait… Rice pudding…?

In case you didn’t catch that; pretty much every language names this dish “Rice & Milk”, or something along those lines, except English, where for some reason it’s a pudding. I guess that’s because pudding is not really considered breakfast food in the western world, but dessert rather. However in many European countries, what English calls “rice pudding” is actually a porridge/cereal-like dish, served warm and is very commonly eaten for breakfast, especially by children. I know I used to eat it a lot when I was baby. (´・ω・`)

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Sólet (Cholent)

Bean stew topped with smoked duck breast, beef, and a halved egg.

Bean stew topped with smoked duck breast, beef, and a halved egg.

(Pronunciation: “Sho-let”)

Sólet, which apparently is the father of cholent, is a Jewish-Hungarian dish usually prepared on Friday nights before the sabbath, simmered overnight, and then eaten the next day for lunch. This was done to conform to Jewish laws that prohibit cooking on the sabbath. Now I’m not Jewish, but this was something I was pretty curious about because it involved cooking on very low heat in an oven for a long period of time, something I haven’t really done before.

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Eggnog – Raw vs Cooked

Eggs, milk, cream, sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, and rum.

Eggs, milk, cream, sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, and rum.

Alright, eggnog! Let’s do this!!!

So let me start off by saying that I’m not scared of salmonella and I’m perfectly fine with consuming raw eggs. After looking into the history of eggnog a little, I found out that traditionally it is made using raw eggs. Also, look up “raw eggnog” and I guarantee most of the results will be by vegans, many of which who deliberately left out the word “vegan” from the title of the post with the chance that non-vegans may click on it and get tricked into making a vegan eggnog using carrageenan, guar gum, natural and artificial flavorings, spices, monoglycerides, and colorings… Wait sorry, those are actually the ingredients found in store-bought eggnog. Raw vegan eggnog is actually pretty good stuff, however, that’s not what I do here. I’m a traditionalist, so if you’re vegan, look for an eggnog recipe elsewhere. And most importantly, regardless of your dietary preferences, don’t buy eggnog from the store, please. Make it yourself, it takes literally 5 minutes and tastes that much better. (´・ω・`)

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Fried Eggs & Hashbrowns

Crispy shredded potatoes served with fried eggs sunny-side-up.

Crispy shredded potatoes served with fried eggs sunny-side-up.

Yeah I know this recipe is probably nothing too fancy, but I figured I needed a breakfast recipe that includes fried eggs served with… well, something other than toast. (´・ω・`)

I mean don’t get me wrong, fried eggs served on toast is a decent breakfast, but there’s no way in hell I’ll be putting up a recipe that goes:

“INGREDIENTS PER SERVING
BREAD
EGGS

STEPS
1. FRY EGGS
2. TOAST TOAST
3. SERVE EGGS ON TOAST
4. ENJOY”

Soooo… hash browns? Hash browns. (◕‿◕✿)

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Sweet Potato Pie

Sweet, sweet potato pie…

I’m a shitty baker… or not…?

I tried my hand at another baking experiment. The chocolate pomegranate tart experiment was either a success or a failure, I’m not even sure… This time I was expecting more or less the same results; a bit of a success and a bit of a failure, but I went in focused… not taking any chances.

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Túrós Rétes (Cottage Cheese Strudel)

Strudels with a sweet cottage cheese filling.

Easiest strudel ever?

Well, it’s easy because I’m using frozen store-bought puff pastry. If you make your own puff pastry, congratulations, you’re better than me. But I have quite a bit of pastry-making karma, so I deserve a little break now and again. (´・ω・`)

Anyways, Hungary is the home of many different strudels, but this is the one my mother always made. Except her recipe uses phyllo pastry instead of puff pastry, which in my opinion is a hassle, harder to work with, burns more easily and most importantly; it doesn’t taste quite as good!

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Madártej (Floating Island)

Sweet egg white meringues floating on top of a creamy custard.

A dessert that originated in France but is also very popular in Hungary, this is a super-rich overly sweet dessert that’s guaranteed to make you too sick to eat anything else for the rest of the day! (´・ω・`) It consists of a crème anglaise (vanilla custard) topped with one, or several meringues (egg white dumplings). Although it’s considered a pretty fancy dessert, the ingredients for this are cheap and are probably already in your kitchen (except maybe the whole milk).

Fairly easy to make, and since it’s served chilled, everything can be done ahead of time! In fact, you probably should do this ahead of time so you can serve your main course fresh and not stress out about serving a fresh dessert as well. ʕ •́؈•̀ ₎

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Yiaourti Me Meli (Yogurt with Honey)

Strained, thick greek yogurt topped with walnuts and honey.

“Yogurt with Honey”, a quick-fix Greek dessert that consists of nothing more than Greek yogurt, honey, and walnuts.

I use the term quick-fix loosely, because in my kitchen, we’re going to want to strain the Greek yogurt for at least 24 hours and Greek yogurt is literally another way of saying “strained yogurt” so yeah, we’re straining strained yogurt until it is pretty much protein free. This dessert is a bodybuilder’s worst nightmare. (´・ω・`)

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